tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post2587487512253795319..comments2023-11-14T17:44:05.708+03:00Comments on Mai to the Extreme: Polygyny and Life UpdateUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-1900274428656902132013-04-29T02:59:10.030+03:002013-04-29T02:59:10.030+03:00Asalaamu Alaikum sister
Mashallah I discovered yo...Asalaamu Alaikum sister<br /><br />Mashallah I discovered your lovely blog today Alhamdulillah. <br /><br />I am on the verge of polygamy at the moment, I could really use your advice and experience In'sha Allāh?<br /><br />If you have the time, please contact me <br />Sfatajo@hotmail.co.uk<br /><br />Jazak-Allahu khayran<br />Sarah xxAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-78473024137607821612012-07-06T13:31:46.875+03:002012-07-06T13:31:46.875+03:00aslm alkm mai and famliy jaza kallah for ur blog i...aslm alkm mai and famliy jaza kallah for ur blog i am south african also a second wife may allah bless your famliy jazak allah aaliyaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-28782246220110511482012-02-16T08:10:37.196+03:002012-02-16T08:10:37.196+03:00salaam bro 1family2wives can i get a link to your ...salaam bro 1family2wives can i get a link to your blog, i searched but couldnt get.<br /><br />brother as you said that your wife is more then a GEM, then i think you made a huge mistake by bringing her a co-wife. Although i am not against polygmay and i know along with huge challenges it also brngs huge benfits to the family if done properly, as you and mai are doing it MashaAllah, May Allah accept it and grant you both jannah. we know that polygamy is sunnah but monogamy is also Sunnah.<br /><br />do you think it is wise to repay all that your wife has done with a co-wife?<br /><br />I am a revert my self so i know how you both are feeling about your mother-in-law and how your mother in law feels about polygmay. yes it is wise as a form of respect to keep silent for matter which people find difficult to understand. but inshaAllah if she understands tauheed and the way of Nabi (saw) and shariah law then it will easy for her to understand why islam allows polygmay.Afsah Farooqhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10292650848964159349noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-91204723781907012172011-03-08T13:27:43.737+03:002011-03-08T13:27:43.737+03:00@ Anonymous: My mother-in-law is a wonderful lady,...@ Anonymous: My mother-in-law is a wonderful lady, but she has different views and understandings. I feel if I say anything to her now, it will be taken the wrong way and not benefit anyone. I may become angry and transgress the bounds. As the mother of my wife, Allah has put her in a position that commands respect. Sometimes it's best to remain silent regardless of what the people think of you. <br /><br />We will just have to give dawah by our actions. Truly, Allah makes Muslims, and is the best of planners.Shariyfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08961997044739097715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-79378434698509171932011-03-08T13:20:04.058+03:002011-03-08T13:20:04.058+03:00@ Anonymous: Zainab will homeschool her own childr...@ Anonymous: Zainab will homeschool her own children when the time comes.Shariyfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08961997044739097715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-52554051688502504872011-03-08T12:25:28.888+03:002011-03-08T12:25:28.888+03:00Is Mai going to homeschool Zainab's babies too...Is Mai going to homeschool Zainab's babies too?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-55529453167928423902011-03-08T11:09:01.185+03:002011-03-08T11:09:01.185+03:00you could tell your mother that without polygamy y...you could tell your mother that without polygamy your husband most likely would've been a serial philanderer...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-29500332130698672862011-03-05T08:41:17.162+03:002011-03-05T08:41:17.162+03:00@ CM: She's more than a gem...she's my bes...@ CM: She's more than a gem...she's my best friend!Shariyfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08961997044739097715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-72630726618117814902011-03-04T23:31:48.712+03:002011-03-04T23:31:48.712+03:00Mai- So that's your secret weapon!!! Well, I h...Mai- So that's your secret weapon!!! Well, I hope you plan on sharing that how-to-keep-your-man-begging-for-more Brownie Recipe!!UmmSalwaanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-61714101676354796352011-03-04T20:09:48.087+03:002011-03-04T20:09:48.087+03:00CM,...well you KNEW what I would say, so I figured...CM,...well you KNEW what I would say, so I figured I might as well save the energy in my fingers to bake those brownies,LOL!<br /><br />Actually, amazingly enough the honeymoon with hubby isn't over at all, mashaa'Allah. We are very happy and enjoy our time together more than ever. I think that it is a VERY part time thing for Zainab for as long as she chooses to work though. <br /><br />In any case, I think the response you suggested would be appropriate for someone who was being taken advantage of unduly. These really are circumstances that are temporary. The Arabic class is only until June. As my husband said, Zainab won't work once motherhood knocks on her door. <br /><br />As for dinner, the better you cook the more people want to eat with you. Those brownies seem to be the key to eternal love and company, LOL! Last weekend I made some organic chocolate peanut butter cookies (like a peanut butter cup but a cookie instead) and I thought hubby was going to die and levitate, LOL. Heart and stomach have strong and clear communication.Healing Earthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01434544812025924667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-87217505631612400232011-03-04T19:56:50.212+03:002011-03-04T19:56:50.212+03:00Umm Salwaa...Ameen! My mother didn't know this...Umm Salwaa...Ameen! My mother didn't know this was the third attempt, and embarrassingly enough, I cannot remember for the life of me if I told her about the first one or not. I have certainly been talking about it and trying to prepare her for the eventuality ever since she visited us in the States in 2006. I waited for a couple of months before telling her, and frankly it is what it is. I am far, far beyond trying to hide my Islam or sweep certain issues under the carpet. Inshaa'Allah, given time she will see the reality of it all. Just as she's seen over these years that Islam didn't turn me into a fanatic or idol worshipper. Tawakalta 'ala Allah!<br /><br />This is a drama-free blog... oh, you made me laugh with that one! Perhaps I should change the name of this to "Drama-Free Blog" LOL!<br /><br />Bi ithn Illah, taala, in this life and in Jennah al Firdaus! Inshaa'Allah, I'll send you an e-mail. We are looking at 120 acres in Colorado.Healing Earthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01434544812025924667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-44090409049616285152011-03-04T19:12:51.493+03:002011-03-04T19:12:51.493+03:00I was wrong Mai - you didn't say anything! lo...I was wrong Mai - you didn't say anything! lol<br /><br />Forget the lemonade - I can clearly see I need your brownie recipe instead!<br /><br />Thanks for the answers 1family2wives. I know you don't need this reminder, but Mai appears to be a gem! You are a lucky man!CMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09877094036608437791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-13426709273086147062011-03-04T18:57:28.438+03:002011-03-04T18:57:28.438+03:00@ CM: Mai only has my children until I get there. ...@ CM: Mai only has my children until I get there. One of the reasons I married Zainab was because I knew there wouldn't be a big change in the schedule in the beginning. <br /><br />Also, homeschooling takes place at Mai's place, so the children need to be there. Zainab can't homeschool the children. If and when Zainab has a baby, her working days will be over. The proper raising of children is paramount. <br /><br />I don't have to eat dinner with Mai and the girls, but I enjoy it. Why eat dinner alone when I can eat with them? Besides...Mai makes delicious brownies :)Shariyfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08961997044739097715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-9174451961586152822011-03-04T18:42:10.122+03:002011-03-04T18:42:10.122+03:00Umm Hamza - ameen ukhty, wa iyaaki! Thanks for tha...Umm Hamza - ameen ukhty, wa iyaaki! Thanks for that vote of confidence, LOL!<br /><br />These logistics are extremely temporary inshaa'Allah. Yes, space is important and after having that delicious gulp of refreshing "free for me" time, I think it is just part of Allah's perfect plan that when the schedule does regulate, I'll be looking forward to it even more. It goes to show how important it is for all to play their part in polygyny. Fortunately, this is a very soft and simple entry into it for us all, wa al hamdu l'Illah.Healing Earthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01434544812025924667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-84775250773105162532011-03-04T17:51:18.647+03:002011-03-04T17:51:18.647+03:00Wa alaykum as salaam wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh ...Wa alaykum as salaam wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh Umm Zakarya,<br /><br />Mashaa'Allah, sister...jazaaki Allahu khayran. It's impossible to make things all complicated when they really are simple and my world is, as always blessed and fine. Al hamdul'Illah! I'm looking forward to the next installment of your Pakistan trip!Healing Earthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01434544812025924667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-41246098049676336532011-03-04T17:47:52.055+03:002011-03-04T17:47:52.055+03:00Umm Shuhada, Alhamdu l'Illah for every ounce o...Umm Shuhada, Alhamdu l'Illah for every ounce of patience Allah has blessed me with. Ameen to your dua!Healing Earthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01434544812025924667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-72686715395893872862011-03-04T17:26:45.019+03:002011-03-04T17:26:45.019+03:00A short lived honeymoon period for you. Now back t...A short lived honeymoon period for you. Now back to real life. It sounds like the only thing changed for you is you get the bed to yourself every other night. Why is it that you get your husband's children on the days Zainab works if she is working nights? And what happens if Zainab wants to work after having children, will you then have her children too?<br /><br />I know you live your life on a higher plain - but for those who have not quite reached that level, would it be wrong to say to a husband something along these lines? "You chose polygamy and all that goes with it. I respect that you now have a new wife and a life with her. But you get all the responsibility that goes along with it. So the schedule stays the same for me when it's not my night. You (husband)and 2nd wife can work out the issues of dinner and children on your nights without involving me. Perhaps that means you (hubby)can cook for the children and get a babysitter when needed. However, I would be happy to help out in emergency situations just as I would hope 2nd wife would do the same for me." <br /><br />I think I can guess what your reply is going to be. lolCMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09877094036608437791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-63858815014431029262011-03-04T17:20:34.996+03:002011-03-04T17:20:34.996+03:00I am really shocked that you told your mom so soon...I am really shocked that you told your mom so soon. He has married several times before, why is she so shocked that he has done it again? May Allah make your affairs easy, Ameen! It is nice to know that this is a drama free blog. You always put Allah first and make the best of your situation to please Allah. I really admire you. I am hoping we meet in this life, inshallah!!UmmSalwaanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-47490139092604333552011-03-04T12:15:44.739+03:002011-03-04T12:15:44.739+03:00Subhan Allah sometimes I forget that polygyny isn&...Subhan Allah sometimes I forget that polygyny isn't always a cookie cutter situation. May Allah give you strength and patience. Space, for me, is a virtue and helped our relationship. Because I had more control of how and when we interact, and less "family" time for shaytan to play with my thoughts. I can only imagine the challenge you're facing right now. LOL if anyone can do it it's MAI insha'Allah! May Allah bless you and your family.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-85531686005971520762011-03-04T11:22:49.898+03:002011-03-04T11:22:49.898+03:00Assalamu Aleykum dear sister,
"I told hubby ...Assalamu Aleykum dear sister,<br /><br />"I told hubby that I'm not feeling much like this is polygyny. I'm not getting any chance to miss him, LOL!", this really made me smile :)<br />MASHALLAH what a beautiful and simple post about polyginy once again.Most of my fears about polyginy vanish whenever I come to your blog.JazakALLAH Khair dear sister!Um Zakaryahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10607028612539180583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2852649203273943364.post-81477041170261029742011-03-04T10:38:46.522+03:002011-03-04T10:38:46.522+03:00May Allah (SWT) reward you for your patience. I ho...May Allah (SWT) reward you for your patience. I hope to find further strenght in your example.umm shuhadaahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01665006448505263731noreply@blogger.com