Thursday, February 23, 2012

Shaytaan's Sneaky Plans

BismIllah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

I am increasingly aware of shaytaan's long-term machinations; how he has pretty much got us surrounded. I am going to list a few of those things, because the more we are aware of those devilish schemes, the more we can guard and fight against them.

Lusts

Lately I've been thinking of how we follow our lusts. In fact, when we manage to control ourselves regarding one lust, we pursue another to congratulate ourselves. Of course, this is all succumbing to shaytaan's suggestions, as he will work from every angle imaginable to put us in a state of loss. Tell me if you can in some way relate to any of these scenarios.
  • After having the will-power to control your eating, you celebrate by "treating yourself" to something frivolous or luxurious that you don't need.
  • After having the will-power to control the urge to shop, you "treat yourself" and binge on chocolate, chips, or some other unhealthy food.
  • After studying hard for a test or meeting a deadline, you "treat yourself" to a few hours of relaxation watching the latest movie or surfing the latest celebrity gossip.
We don't struggle to conquer our lusts, we struggle to conquer one lust and then replace it with another -.perhaps one we consider the lesser evil. If we conquer the lust for one Islamically undesirable thing, we succumb to the lust for another. Just think about it: entertainment, consumerism, socialization, and over-indulgence - one lust after another. If we try to categorize our lusts and excesses to see which category shaytaan is working his sneaky plans, for the most part we will find that he gets us from most, if not all, of them. 

Clothing

Then there is that circular issue that I went to the imam about four years ago - our clothes and personal presentation.  Allah tells us not to imitate or dress like the unbelievers, the non-Muslims. This goes for men and women, so the brother who kits himself out to look just like the gangster/drug dealer/pimp/ex-con/ convict/profanity rapper needs to really think about that. The "baggy-pants-with-underwear-and-backside-hanging-out look" originated in the prisons. Criminal fashion became "cool" worldwide. Are they cool to Allah? Are you imitating a role model or a potential guest of the Fire?

As for women, the hairstyles, make-up, tight jeans and belly t-shirts, latest high-street fashion...are they all imitating the women we should consider our role models?  I fear that we are nowhere near any resemblance to them in this state. In fact, we are imitating those same women we see on the streets, the billboards, television, and magazine covers - the ones who do not adhere to the Muslim faith or practice modesty as per its tenets.

Here's the trap: 

Men must lower their gaze, but subhaan Allah, everywhere they turn there are uncovered women portrayed in the typical "pin-up" way. Even if men are careful, even if they do lower their gaze after seeing women displayed in a provocative manner, they have still seen. The image has entered their head. It is natural for them to desire what they see outside. Men may want their wives to present themselves in a similar way so they can have at home what they see and desire outside.

At the same time, women should try to present themselves to their husbands in a way that will please them. Many women feel that because the men see, and are tempted by, the non-muslims because of the way they dress/present themselves, that they should dress the same way. They want to give their husbands the same thing he sees outside, in a halal environment. So, women dress like the non-Muslims and wear what the high street dictates as the latest hot fashion. They do it to please her husband and safeguard him from zina, but they imitate the non-Muslims in the meantime. 

Hmmm. Totally stuck between the rock and the hard place. If they go one route, they are disobeying Allah, and if they go the other route, they are disobeying Allah. It is a circular trap of shaytaan that many cannot even see, let alone escape, because it has been so long established. Of course, Allah knows our hearts and our intentions, and the safeguarding of her husband and pleasing him is paramount, so if she does it for that purpose with genuine dislike for imitating the non-Muslims, then Allah most surely knows it and rewards her for it. The key is awareness and sincere intentions.

Internet

Now just think of this amazing Internet. We all know that there is a great deal of haram and fitna to be found on it. We also know that there is a wealth of information, beneficial knowledge, and a way of maintaining the ties of family and ummah. However, even with removal of images and muting the sound to avoid music, in the name of da'wah and beneficial communication, we cannot avoid every image and often end up wasting valuable time. We easily get sidetracked. In searching for information, we easily get sucked into conversations. The time required to respond to e-mail, keep up with news (even if limited to Islamic matters), is notable. I have numerous friends who tell me about the fitna of Facebook, wasting time on inane details of others' lives - things of no benefit, or even worse, of harm. Is it the best use of our time? Is it even decent use of our time? Is it all worshiping Allah? Is Allah pleased with our activity or not? 

When I think of the Internet, I remember the ayah of Quran in Surah Al Baqarah revealed about alcohol and gambling.
"They ask you (O Muhammad ) concerning alcoholic drink and gambling. Say: "In them is a great sin, and (some) benefits for men, but the sin of them is greater than their benefit.'' (2:219)
The Internet is another sneaky, circular plan of shaytaans, because it is essential for normal life and information as we know it and yet, it holds traps from the time we open up the browser.
These are just three little examples of shaytaan's long-term machinations. That rotten devil doesn't just whizz around whispering for us to make a bad decision or do a wrong thing. He has been working on communities, societies, countries, and the world since the time he was cast out, rejected by Allah. He's had literally thousands of years to develop his plans, which leave us encircled.

Oh, I know this sounds terribly depressing and rather hopeless...but it is not. Awareness is part of the solution and so is caution. When we can see those plans in action throughout society, we also build up awareness of the very real fact that shaytaan never sleeps. He is always trying to sabotage our good end. Seeking a way out through dua' is another. May Allah increase our taqwa, our wisdom, repel us from what He hates, and what leads to what He hates. May Allah show us how to worship Him in all situations,  and strengthen us against shaytaan's sneaky plans - ameen.

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Running to Catch the Last January Bus!

Bism Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

A thousand apologies! I have not, in any way, managed to get my act together and develop all the deep-as-the-ocean thoughts I've been having over these past months. In fact, I have this epic post about shaytaan's sneaky plans which I've added to here and there, but still cannot wrap it up and present it to you all. Perhaps a big dua' is in order for me to really put things together and make a decent contribution in February...which is just a matter of hours away.

Anyway, what I read this past couple of months was notable in that it is a subject we don't think about too much. It also was a verification of several points I've firmly believed, advocated for, and adhered to over the years. The book is called, "Waswasah, The Whispering of the Shaitan." and it is excellent preparation for my upcoming post, bi ithn Illah ta'ala, on shaytaan's sneaky plans.  If you scroll down to the bottom of this page you will find the book available for download.

If your really in a reading mood, I highly recommend the book Patience and Gratitude on that same page. I'm working my way through all the books and, as always, benefiting immensely, mashaa'Allah.

Goodbye January...and to all who have asked me why I haven't updated this blog, sorry for the no-show!

Quieter and Quieter

BismIllah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

It is reported that the wife of Imâm Sa’îd b. Al-Musayyib – Allâh have mercy on him – said:
We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] “May Allâh keep you right!”, “May Allâh keep you well!”
Abû Nu’aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 5:198.
Subhaan Allah...this post is to mark progress in my development and give many of you hope. I am, by nature, a communicator and a sincere, caring advisor. In other words, I usually have something to say about other people's ideas, situations, and plans when they are presented to me. However, it hasn't always elicited a positive reaction, especially when I was not in agreement or felt strongly about it from an Islamic perspective.


For most of my life, I have suppressed negative feelings until they had built up so much that my whole demeanor changed. I could not go about my daily life without the negative feelings dominating my thoughts, attitude, and reactions. Most usually, I would end up blurting out my "issues" in a way that was neither well-planned or well-presented.

Well, that has changed all thanks and praise be to Allah, subhaana wa taala. These past few months, whenever I have negative feelings, I literally bite my tongue (gently...no self-abuse syndrome, LOL). My husband and I cannot help but laugh when I do it, mashaa'Allah. I purposely press my lips together. When specifically asked to speak, I really take my time and strive to relay basic facts or events from my own perspective, and/or objectively, rather than comment on others.

Then I read this:

It is reported that the wife of Imam Sa'id B. Al-Musayyib - Allah have mercy on him - said:

We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] "May Allah keep you right!", "May Allah keep you well!"

From the Manners of a Wife with her Husband

It is reported that the wife of Imâm Sa’îd b. Al-Musayyib – Allâh have mercy on him – said:
We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] “May Allâh keep you right!”, “May Allâh keep you well!”
Abû Nu’aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 5:198.
After the death of his wife Umm Sâlih, Imâm Ahmad – Allâh have mercy on them, used to praise her. He once said:
In the thirty years she was with me, we never had a single word of disagreement.
Al-Khatîb Al-Baghdâdî, Târîkh Baghdâd 16:626.
It is reported that the wife of Imâm Sa’îd b. Al-Musayyib – Allâh have mercy on him – said:
We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] “May Allâh keep you right!”, “May Allâh keep you well!”
Abû Nu’aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 5:198.


Abu Nua'ym, Hilyatu al-Awliya 5:198

It is reported that the wife of Imâm Sa’îd b. Al-Musayyib – Allâh have mercy on him – said:
We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] “May Allâh keep you right!”, “May Allâh keep you well!”
Abû Nu’aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 5:198.

After the death of his wife, Umm Salih, Imam Ahmad - Allah have mercy on them - used to praise her. He once said:

In the thirty years she was with me, we never had a single word of disagreement.

Al-Khatib Al-Baghdadi, Tarikh Baghdad 6:626

Increasingly I avoid saying, "I told you so," or mention that I had advised against something that ended up going wrong. I don't even speak out about the things I disagree with anymore. I stay quiet and then I say, "May Allah keep you well! May Allah keep you right!" My husband and I literally laugh out loud, mashaa'Allah.

Now you all may be wondering what the result of all this has been so far. Those things I have managed to hold my tongue about, which were communicated to Allah for help and resolution, are coming to light, being examined, and being resolved, mashaa'Allah. I didn't speak about them, except to the One ("You alone I turn to and You alone I ask for help" - Surah al Fatiha, ayah 4).

Some things take time, but when you see Allah take over your affairs and rectify them without you speaking a single word about them to others, it is a great incentive to get quieter and quieter.

From the Manners of a Wife with her Husband

It is reported that the wife of Imâm Sa’îd b. Al-Musayyib – Allâh have mercy on him – said:
We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] “May Allâh keep you right!”, “May Allâh keep you well!”
Abû Nu’aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 5:198.

From the Manners of a Wife with her Husband

It is reported that the wife of Imâm Sa’îd b. Al-Musayyib – Allâh have mercy on him – said:
We only ever used to speak to our husbands like you address your commanders and leaders: [we would supplicate for them when talking to them] “May Allâh keep you right!”, “May Allâh keep you well!”
Abû Nu’aym, Hilyatu Al-Awliyâ` 5:198.

If silence is golden, then dua' must be platinum...
because it gets you through all those times you are silent.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The Addition Rule

BismIllah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

Most of us know, not just adults but children as well, that it really doesn't matter what someone says if their actions contradict it. After all, if someone tells you that you are highly valued and precious to them but then takes advantage of you, doesn't fulfill their promises and commitments to you and yet bends over backwards to lavish favors and things on others, will you believe them?


I call it the addition rule: everything should add up. One plus one should equal two.

i.e.: I say something (1), + my actions back it up (1), then it is, bi ithn Illah, true (=2).

Similarly, if a brother or a sister says they are practicing Islam and fear Allah, and yet aren't praying or following Allah's guidance and examples, will you believe them? Practicing islam and taqwa (1) + no prayers or practice (-1) = 0 on the truth scale.


There is so much value in being true to others, but we cannot be true to others unless we are true to ourselves.   You may think that you can hide the truth from others, but Allah may expose what you thought would never come to light. Don't take that chance. Don't be a liar to yourself, because in turn you will be a liar to others, and worse of all, you will be a liar in the Eyes of Allah.

Dunya Check

Bism Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

We can find excellent and detailed reading material on not giving importance to material things and avoiding pride, arrogance, and showing off, mashaa'Allah. However, I think we can all benefit from a daily dunya check.

Ask yourself why you are doing whatever you do.
  • Why did you choose those particular clothes and accessories?
  • Why are you buying whatever you plan to buy?
  • Why are you giving or taking that thing?
  • Why do you have each and every one of your possessions?

Think about it honestly. What influences your decision to do the things you do? Is it for the pleasure of, and obedience to, Allah? Or is it to present yourself in the best light and get others' approval or compliments? Is it to fulfill a life necessity? Or is it to add to the collection of things you want or like? Does everything you own have a genuinely beneficial purpose? Or is there a trace of competition in you, to in some way be better than, or outdo, others?

I'll pop an extreme (LOL) example in here now. I have some jewelry, mashaa'Allah. While it is all simple in design, it has notable value, mashaa'Allah. However, I very, very, rarely wear any of it.  The only thing I do wear are earrings (so my holes don't close up), which I change from time to time so my husband sees something different, and a watch.

You might think that I wear the jewellery when I go out to gatherings, but most especially I never wear it then. Why? Because I do not want to show off. I don't want to draw attention to my possessions. I don't want some sister, who may not have such jewelry, to feel jealousy or instill a desire for such material things in her. For me, such things are pure dunya. To be honest, I don't even see any reason to adorn myself in such a way for other women; such adornment is reserved for my husband.You might wonder why I even keep the jewelry, but it is for my children to inherit on my death. Allah only knows what they may need in the future, and it is their right.

I have things of good enough quality that they are beneficial to my well-being and health, but not so good that they are extravagant, inshaa'Allah. Believe me, I've been down the extravagant and wasteful road and I pray I see the road signs and never go down that road again, wa audhu b'Illahi min as-shaytaan ir-rajeem!

I know that often we don't like to ask ourselves questions that we don't have good, or the right answers, for. However, those are exactly the questions we have to keep asking ourselves if we are to correct ourselves and improve.

People don't know your worth - only Allah does. 
Strive to increase in value every day - just for Him.

Uh-oh, Missed October...November 2011

Bism Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

Please accept my apologies for not posting in October. I had various ideas that needed to be developed, but I focused my time and efforts on other more immediate things. Even now, I only have two posts this month because that is all I could develop well enough to be worthwhile. I won't write posts to pass (waste) your time or just to have some new words up on the screen. I write when there is something worth writing, bi ithn Illah.

My Cyberfocus:

www.80percentwords.com


Dhul Hijjah:


We are in these most revered 10 days of Dhul Hijjah.  If you are able to perform Hajj, go. If you are able to fast, fast, If you are able to give sadaqah, give. If you are able to pray more, pray. If you are able to speak, recite Qur'an and adhkaar of Allah. If you are only able to think, remember and beg of Allah. When Allah gives you days where there is no loss, only rich benefit from any good, take them! Don't waste your time, when so much opportunity is open to you every second of these precious days. That one utterance of al hamdul'Illah may tip your scales to the right hand side or elevate you one rank in Jennah!

May Yawm al Arafat be a merciful erasing of sins for you all , and on the upcoming occasion of Eid Al Adha 1432 -

Taqabbal Allah minna wa minkum!

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About Me

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I love to take long walks. I'm 46 and loving it. I have two daughters 5 & 8 years old, one husband, two step children, and no pets. I'm overwhelmed by Allah's Love. I'm in awe of the Prophet's example (salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam).