BismIllah wa as salaamu alaykum.
SNAP! What does it? What is the thing that finally makes us snap? Which button is the one that, when pushed, sends us over the edge?
Ideally, Islamically, none.
Ideally, Islamically, we would say, "Audhu b'Illahi min as shaytaan irrajeem!" and keep our cool.
However, as humans, the ideal in Islam is something to strive for but not something we can fully attain. It is the striving that is important and the desperate disappointment in always falling short that makes us cry to Allah seeking forgiveness.
Bearing with patience, sabr, oh how hard it is when resources are low and the button is pushed. Oh how miserable to lose control and feel helplessly in the grips of shaytaan.
Remember the dua' "Oh Allah! Set not in authority over me one who is unjust!" After all this, shaytaan whispers to seek vengeance, to ask for justice and open signs. But Allah, subhaana wa taala, remains ever present and the depth of our faith wins the fight. We come to our senses and pray for the good, drawing to Islam. As we turn to Allah, we emerge stronger in deen, increased in taqwa.
Too deep? Saying, "Huh?" What I'm saying is that whenever we have an argument and we overcome the urges for vengeance and soften our hearts to seek the good for all involved, we increase our faith and taqwa. Anytime we lose control, allow shaytaan to infiltrate the goodness, and then fight back with true faith and a sincere heart, Allah Gifts us with a better level of deen.
Alhamdul'Illahi Rabb il al ameen!