Ramadhaan Programme 2012: Part 1

Bism Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

This year I am sharing something with you all that I used last year for my children - daily juz Qur'an questions. In addition, for the two days leading up to Ramadhaan, I gave them questions to research, to give them preparatory knowledge of our Book of Guidance - the Qur'an. All this was based on the Sahih International Qur'an translation, which we since learned was not an accurate representation of Allah's words. We therefore have switched to The Noble Qur'an by Hilali-Khan.

So, with Ramadhaan just a couple of days away, I'm giving you my first set of questions for the pre-Ramadhaan preparation. These questions are taken from the section of the Qur'an translation titled, "History of Qur'an Compilation."

History of Qur'an Compilation

• Did they start making written records of the Qur'an after the Prophet, salla Allahu alayhi wa salaam, died?
• In the beginning, was the whole Qur'an put together (compiled) in one big book?
• Who brought all the Qur'an together onto written sheets (suhuf)? Who ordered him to do that?
• How did they make sure that the Qur'an was correctly recorded on paper?
• Which of the Prophet's wives held the complete Qur'an?
• Who was the caliph that standardised the Qur'an and had copies made for each of the Islamic territories?
• Why didn't the first Qur'ans have any dots or vowel marks?
• Why did they add the dots and vowel marks?
• What are the three stages in which the various marks were added?

I hope this will encourage some of you to take up the challenge and read to seek the answers to these questions and/or use them for your own children. In doing so, you will have accomplished and learned a great deal by the end of this precious and beloved month, all qualifying as a most beautiful worship bi ithn Illah.

For those of you wondering what I will be doing this year, considering I've given different questions on the daily Qur'an juz for two years in a row now, I'm going to use the book, "Fasting from Alif to Yaa" with the family, inshaa'Allah. Of course we will read the complete Qur'an as well, bi ithn Illah, but rather than do Shk. Uthaymeen's Daily Sittings again, we will move on to a fresh program with more hands-on activities for the children.

Don't wait till the night Ramadhaan is announced to focus yourself on this month...focus your heart, your mind, and your body on doing your very best for Allah this year and may Allah make us all successful in our fasting, our worship, and our dua' - AMEEN!

Mai in June 2012

BismIllah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

What's Up:

We have finished another school year here, exams are over and I'm getting ready to change focus for the summer, inshaa'Allah. Hubby and I will be doing a Permaculture Design Certification course starting in the coming days inshaa'Allah. This is all in preparation for our design, planning, development, and living on our land in New Mexico, now officially named, "Healing Earth," mashaa'Allah. June 13th marks our departure to England for a month to visit with my parents, breathe fresh air, and see lots of GREENERY and fat woolly sheep, mashaa'Allah. We are booked to attend a private Cob House Natural Building course designed for our family while we are there inshaa'Allah. All this so that we can live as naturally and as close to the Sunnah as possible on our land and teach other Muslims how to do the same, bi ithn Illah ta'ala.

I look forward to posting about our vision and goals for Healing Earth, but will give you a taster here. We plan to build cob cottages for Muslim retreats, inshaa'Allah. We also plan to have a Muslim family campground to accommodate around 125 people, with cob pizza ovens, inshaa'Allah. We will make a natural playground, a track, obstacle course, and archery area bi ithn Illah. There will be courses on making your own pizza ovens, rocket stoves, cob and strawbale homes, Permaculture design and practice for living sustainably, and lessons in green and deen by teaching Qur'an and Islamic Sciences in a setting conducive to living Islam and the Sunnah, inshaa'Allah.  May Allah give us success in serving Him and spreading His Perfected Religion through emulating the ideal example of our beloved Prophet Muhammad, salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam - ameen!

Just to say:

There is a dua' that has served me well and done so much for the development of my taqwa and and lifestyle. Many of you have figured it out by now, because you've seen it in other posts on this blog, but the reminder always benefits the believer. It is simply this:

"Oh Allah, let me love all that You love and make clear to me what You love, and let me hate all that you hate and make clear to me what you hate."

I make this dua' for others as well; those near and dear to me and those who are not, because if we all unite on what Allah loves and avoid what He hates, we will be the best of our generation.

Tested:

It is important to know that you if welcome Allah's tests and handle them well, He will send harder ones to you. This is not to punish you, but simply to move you to greater depths of faith and heights of emaan. Our family is being tested with a force that we never would have imagined possible, wa al hamdul'Illah 'ala kully haal, and what I found is this. When the test becomes so great that you are rendered totally helpless and speechless at its magnitude, you finally realize to a depth never reached before, that Allah is the only place to turn. At the onset of the whole ordeal, I simply stood with my hands held up in supplication and said, "Allahumma, alayka ______________!" three times. This is in line with the Sunnah of our Prophet, salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam, when he faced such a situation with Abu Jahl and his consorts. Although I have to have great patience while relying on Allah, I have the absolute knowledge that, although I cannot imagine how this will be resolved, it most certainly will be. Allahu musta'an.

Failings:

There are times when my failings overwhelm me. Times when I am so sick of my inability to control my emotions or reactions that I just want to run away and never deal with another person again as long as I live. What an amazing concept. Of course, that would not be convenient for my family or friends. Even more, that would totally defy what Allah meant for me, which is to worship Him alone through all the fitan of life that He presents me with.

So, I cry in misery and disappointment in myself to Allah and then try to find a balance between humility (dragging my self-esteem out of the drain) and acceptance. Acceptance of what? That Allah has made us imperfect, it is part of the design. If we were perfect, there would be no test. In fact, we would be the same as the rest of His creation...without free will. Allah tells us that it is us erring and then turning to Him in repentance - sincere repentance - that is the key to our growth and success.

It is reported that Talq b. Habîb – Allâh have mercy on him – said, “The right of Allâh is too great and heavy for the creation to fulfill and the blessings of Allâh are too many to enumerate, but you should remain repentant, morning and evening.”
Ibn Abî Al-Dunyâ, Al-Tawbah article 62.

What I'm reading:


My Home, My Path (this gem is my new, all day, every day handbook, and is top of my reading list for my Ramadhaan preparation, mashaa'Allah)


My Cyber-focus:


Following the Sunnah

taalib.com

islaam4kids.com
 

Stay tuned for my upcoming "heavyweight" post on amanah, sin, and istighfar....and barak Allahu feekum all my dear readers!

Are you a doormat?

BismIllah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

It is very common in the Western world to hear women complain that they are treated like doormats by their husbands and families. This attitude has also been adopted by some Muslims, especially women with large families and husbands who are busy working and do not help around the house. They raise the children, prepare the meals, keep the house, and welcome their husband home with service and a smile. So, how can you feel good in a relationship where you are an 'open all hours' one-stop shop?

Remember that it is shaytaan telling you that you're a doormat, used and abused. Allah tells you that you are the "home," the essential foundation for the future of our Ummah, in a place of honor and great importance. shaytaan tells us that we are like 24 hour maids for working hard to please our families. However, Allah tells you that you are an obedient, faithful servant who is fulfilling her duty to Him by serving her family. shaytaan  whispers in our ears that we are taken for granted, unappreciated. Allah tells us that every sincere effort to make and preserve the home and family is part of worship.    

Allah tells us that for every minute we strive to please Him through our appointed duties to please and support our husbands, raise our children upon the Qur'an and Sunnah, and perform our own Islamic responsibilities, we are in a state of ibadah. So tell me, which one do you want to listen to, the rejected outcast or your Creator?

Watch Out - It's a Blessing!

Bism Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

I recently thought of something that spurred this post. I can easily see the blessings in tests and I write frequently about that. What I haven't written about is the tests that lie in blessings. When I first mention there being a test in a blessing, for some the first thing that springs to mind is the test of giving due thanks. That, most certainly, is one test. We must always remember that the blessing is a gift from Allah and give thanks to Him. However, we also need to look at the thing we perceive to be a blessing and see where else we are being tested by it. Here are some examples that I can think of from real life experiences.

Women are often tested with their beauty. They may be blessed with certain beautiful or attractive features, which Islam requires them to conceal them from general public view. The blessing is a test; will she guard her modesty and fight the desire for public praise and admiration? Will she take care of herself properly, mindfully maintaining the blessing Allah has given her?

The successful man, be it in financial status, work, education, or Islamic knowledge, is blessed. The blessing is a test; if he receives compliments, will he be humble and attribute all good to Allah, or will he start believing in his own self-made excellence? Will he use his success to worship Allah sincerely?

My daughter recently reflected on this subject and asked me how her doll can be a test. I told her to think about it for a moment, after which she almost instantly said that it is a test because she could spend too much time playing with it instead of doing her work. It could also be a test because she could be tempted to put a face on it and try to make it more realistic. Just a simple doll, a child's toy, but most surely a test.

Although it isn't always easy to see the test in a blessing, it is like a pulse - sometimes hard to find, but it is always there.  


May Allah, subhaana wa ta'ala, open our eyes to the tests He sends us and increase our emaan, taqwa, and tawakkal in order to pass them - ameen.

What Currency are you Dealing in?

Bism Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

How do you estimate the value of something?

Subhaan Allah, those of you who know me, know that I tend to come up with analogies for things. For the various things I guard and warn against, I often find new and different angles from which to approach them. Just recently I was faced with someone who was comparing people's worth in terms of their physical attributes.  Girls here are fed the exact same stereotypical "princess" concept as in the West. So many children (and adults, sadly) think that the stereo-typical Disney princess characters are the ideal. Even here in Madinah, many girls show off their princess pictures, notebooks, stickers, and bags. Fortunately ours, and those children of our good friends, do not get such items, but there is still the underlying ideal planted in their minds.

Having pretty dresses, nice hair, slimmer figures, and beautiful faces are the benchmarks for being "better." Yes, I know I've written about such things before on the post, When We Stand Before Allah, but from the aspect of pride (kibr) and arrogance.  However, the aspect I'm addressing is how we value such things. Looking at such things as valuable, or being something that has great weight or worth, is dealing in dunya dollars. When they are presented in front of Allah as proof of achievement and good in this life, those dollars won't be worth the paper they are printed on.

However, when we look with admiration at those who have beautiful manners (akhlaaq), are modest in all situations (hayaa), take care of their speech and actions (taqwa), recite the Qur'an correctly and implement it, learn and teach Islam as practiced by the Salaf, and truly worship Allah in all situations, then we can see that they are dealing in a completely different currency. They are holding Islamic ingots that are worth their weight in gold when presented to Allah. Rather than the dunya dollars, which will burn into ashes, they will be dealing in a currency that reaps Allah's rewards, which last for all eternity.

If anyone innovative and creative would like to take these three concepts and make up a family game or reward system, you have my wholehearted support. However, if you do, please let us know so others may know and benefit from it. We need to teach our children (and remind ourselves) that accruing dunya dollars might get us to the finish line, but the Islamic ingots will make us the real winners of Allah's rewards.

Parenting Audit

Bism’Illah wa as salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.

Subhaan Allah, parenting is a test I truly fear I will fail. Time and time again, when I promise myself I will not get upset or raise my voice, I find every single button has been pushed and I am upset and shouting. May Allah forgive me and bring me to a far better place – ameen.  However, when my children say things that imply that I am totally unreasonable to punish them for bad behavior or to make conditions regarding how they can get things they like, I start to wonder if I have failed in imparting my message. Just recently, it seemed like the time had come for a parenting audit. 

So, after reading a thought-provoking  title on someone's  blog, I decided to ask my daughters what was important to me. Yes, I typed it rightly; I asked them what they thought was important to ME.  Without hesitation they said, in unison, “Jennah - us pleasing Allah and getting to Jennah.”  For those of you who know me, the veritable leaky tap, you know that I cried when I heard that. I cried tears of relief and of sheer gratefulness that, regardless of how hard it is at times to bear their behavior and words, my goal for them was known.

Part two of the audit came a day or two later, when we had a tawheed lesson. Afterwards, and with much encouragement because they enjoy these lessons, mashaa’Allah, I read them  a post on How the Salaf raised their Children. I heard a slight groan when I got to parts that they weren’t adhering to, but I was urged to read them another post on Questions Pertaining to Children’s Clothes. After finishing, I asked them if, based on what we had read, I was doing my job properly. A unanimous, “Yes,” was the response, mashaa’Allah.  

The audit will continue, inshaa’Allah,  where I read other parenting guidelines to them and have them be the judge of whether I’m meeting the standards. There are several more very relevant ones on the same website, and I have some other resources along those lines as well. I plan to read sections of Minhaj Al Muslim to them on daily etiquettes, manners, prayer, etc. and have them judge if I am modeling and teaching them correctly.  

These are all important lessons that children need be reminded of, ad nauseum at times. They love to be given lessons where they can show that they already have in-depth knowledge and understanding of the subject. They love to get the answers right.

In going over these critical issues, I not only remind about, reinforce, and re-encourage behaviors, but I make them look at it from a different perspective. I make them consider if I have taught them and shown them these important lessons.  Some of you may be thinking, surely Mai knows if she taught them those things and models them or not. You’re right, I do. However, my children need to consciously acknowledge that I do. It doesn’t help to tell them that I do all that for them, but it does help when they have to examine me and realize it for themselves.  

May Allah increase us in 'ilm (knowledge), sabr (patience), hikma (wisdom), rahma (mercy), rifq (kindness), emaan (faith), taqwa (peity), ibaadah (worship), and bestow on us a large, and much needed, extra dose of sabr (patience)- ameen!