As salaamu alaikum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh,
The thought of dying and leaving our children can send us in to fits of insecurity and tearful horror of what our children will have to face without us. Who will care for our children? Will they be loved and cared for well? Will they have to face abuse, hardships, will they be good Muslims?
The insecurity, the concern, the fear... it's shaytaan. That devil is leading us to thoughts that are pure shirk.
Allah, SWT, willed your children into existence and He is their ONLY protector and guardian. He will NEVER leave your children. What harm can EVER come to our children if Allah, SWT, doesn't Will it?
We have been blessed with our children and Allah, SWT, has given us the gift of raising them and nurturing them. However, we are not indispensable. We are only visitors.
The Prophet, SAW, was orphaned at such a young age...and what did Allah, SWT, do? Protected him and guided him EVERY DAY OF HIS LIFE. Subhaan Allah, he gave him prophethood! Subhaan Allah, He sent him as a mercy to all mankind!
So what do we as mothers do? We trust completely in Allah, SWT. We know, WITHOUT A DOUBT, that Allah, SWT, will always provide for our children. We send shaytaan packing. And we take the amanah (trust) that Allah has placed in us very seriously in regards to raising our children. That means giving them love, mercy, compassion...and also discipline, rules, and enforcing obedience. After all, if they cannot be obedient, how will they obey Allah, SWT? We teach them Islam, through every day life, and we give thanks and praise to Allah, SWT, for the gift of being in their lives.
May Allah, SWT, give us a long life to be there for them and do our best for them - ameen!