As salaamu alaikum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh akhawaati,
This post does not apply to every sister, but it will apply to some. This is for those sisters who love to shop, who shop for pleasure, who shop to improve their mood, who shop for bargains that they do not need, who shop and have to justify it to their husbands, who shop and end up in trouble with their husbands, and who shop without thinking of the responsibility that comes with it. LOL, perhaps this applies to more than some...more like most! Anyway, I have a few ideas that might help calm that habit or empower you to stop altogether.
The first thing is to put things into perspective in relation to the examples we have been given of how we should live our life. During the time of the Prophet (salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam), people had just what they needed, nothing more. In fact, if they were given something more than they needed, they gave it to those needier than themselves. Today, we have so much of everything that we cannot find adequate storage space for it, audhu b'Illah!
The second thing is to be clear in your mind about what is "israaf" and what is "tabzeer". Israaf is the spending on things that are lawful in Islam but exceeding moderation in quantity or quality. Tabzeer is the spending wastefully on things that are prohibited in Islam...and many things fall under this category if they are against Islamic principals...such as most movies, clothes with images on them, music, etc.
Thirdly, remember that you must answer to Allah, subhaana wa taala, for every penny you spend.
Then, consider if you NEED the item and if the item will draw you closer to Allah, subhaana wa taala.
Then consider if it will be welcomed by your husband.
Then, think what better use the money might be put to.
Why don't many of us have our own land, homes, money for hajj or umrah? We spend it on an assortment of things we don't need, that don't benefit us, and even are a sinful waste.
I speak from experience sisters. I have made taubah for years of extravagant and sinful expenditure in the past. Since getting married, I have realized the beauty of not shopping...and my husband has been very appreciative of it, masha'Allah. Nothing has ever been a problem, no matter how little money we had or how much, and many dreams are real possibilities because we take spending money as a big amanah (trust) from Allah.
Look for ways to reduce expenses and think before you shop. You may find yourself on Hajj next year from the money you save, bi ithn Allah!
May we all have the ultimate success and many small ones on the way - ameen!
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