BismIllah wa as salaamu alaikum wa Rahmat Allah,
Subhaan Allah! I manage quite well to hold my tongue with my husband, but when it comes to my children I lose my temper more quickly and tend to say things that I later think are not a good model to them. Oh, don't start imagining swear words or any such thing, but certainly sarcasm comes out at times and much more impatient annoyance than is warranted. So, because I want to emulate the Prophet, salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam, and not speak in anger or raise my voice excessively, I have come up with a plan. I'm calling it the "Blurt Alert." I'm taking one second before I blow my gasket to say, out loud, "Hold on a minute, please!" That is my cue, my warning signal, my checkpoint that say's, "Take a moment to think about your response and if you can't think clearly, shut up." I'm planning to write this on paper, on the whiteboard, around and about the house as a reminder insha'Allah.
Now, the warning signal may vary from person to person. Perhaps you will say, "Hold up, sistah!" or "Hang about there, missy!" or "Just a sec, okay?" You get my drift though...something that reminds you. I'm planning to revisit this discussion to update you on how it works for me insha'Allah. I'd love to hear if this works for any of you, too bi ithn Allah.
Fi amaan Illah.